Well the dreaded milestone is here. Only dreaded because of the sound of it. When you enter the decade your father died in, you change. Your perspective changes. Your priorities change and relationships change. You want to make the most of every minute you have left on the clock. You want to spend it with people you enjoy and you want peace. You are over the foolishness and the fakes. You don’t want to hash things out anymore. You want to make a difference, as much as you possibly can before your life on earth is over. You think about your legacy or if you will even have one. You start to value things you never considered before. You focus.
Last year was hard. I thought it would be grand. It absolutely had grand moments but things broke my heart. People wounded me and shocked me. Life caught me by surprise and I am still sorting it out and may never understand. It’s OK. Time will heal and life is grand.
What are my goals for this next decade? Simple. I want to love my family and keep them close. They have become my best friends and favorite people. I want to help them figure things out because life is hard. The pressure and expectations are way too much. I want to let go of relationships that cause me pain. I want to value my time and spend it making a difference not keeping everyone else’s agenda for me. I want to encourage young ones to keep going and to push past their fears. I want to ignore the petty, the meaningless and the things that waste time. I want to laugh, experience and enjoy every single moment. I want to remind myself that God will cover all my mistakes at parenting, at work, at life. I have realized the older I get the less I know and I don’t need to know the whole plan just take the next step.
As I look ahead, I am grateful. I am so blessed. No matter what I face, I know God will help me navigate. He is the best counselor, friend and leader we could have. He is enough. So bring on the next decade. I am ready.
You will keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on You,because he trusts in You. Isaiah 26:3
