Eddie's Angels

Almost a year ago, we started the whole process of figuring out why Eddie walked so high on his toes.  I was never really concerned until I took him for a physical and he couldn’t balance on the scale.  The nurse who I have known through 5 kids, told the doctor about it.  She had Eddie try to walk flat-footed and we actually laughed because he looked like Frankenstein, poor kid.  She suggested an X-ray to check for a tethered spine.  We went to Wolfson and thank God, the X-ray was normal.  Like an idiot, I googled toe walking and fear entered my heart.  I was honestly just looking for some exercises and saw how it can be a sign for autism to cerebral palsy and worse.

The next step was to take him to Nemours to see a Pediatric Orthopedic Doctor to check him out to see if we needed to go on to neurology.  He was really positive and didn’t think surgery would be needed or that we needed to do an MRI or anything extreme.  He suggested waiting a year and coming back.  As a parent, for some reason, you feel like a failure when something is wrong with your kids, like you made it happen somehow.  I was happy with his assessment but didn’t have peace about waiting a whole year. 

Mary Kay

Our church hosted a concert and my Mom and I went.  God ordained for me to see a very special friend of ours, Mary Kay, who I haven’t seen in many years.  We were visiting and catching up and I was telling her about all of Eddie’s issues.  Duhhh, I was reminded that she is a physical therapist with kids.  She said she wanted to come meet Eddie and check him out!  She came over and blew my mind.  She had him doing all kinds of crazy stuff, having fun but stretching his calves out at the same time.  It was an amazing thing to behold.  We really tried hard to figure out if my insurance would cover her as his therapist but just couldn’t make it work.  She would have totally done it for free but we just couldn’t ask her to take Eddie on too along with all her full load of kids.

My doctor gave us a referral for Brookes Rehab for therapy.  I was so overwhelmed and felt like crying on a regular basis when I thought about adding something else to my out of control schedule.  When you start a family, they are all so cute and cuddly.  Then they grow up and require so much of your time and money, driving them everywhere, homework and more.  It’s daunting on many days even though I am so thankful for each one of them. That’s why I depend on my relationship with the Lord so much!  If God didn’t help me everyday, I would surely die or at least run away!!  Being a parent is a regular reminder of your shortcomings.

Ms Jenn working hard with Ed

We went to Brookes Rehab for our first appointment and I was dreading every bit of the future process. Eddie is my most opinionated, stubborn kid and the thought of someone stretching his muscles and forcing him to do exercises made me cringe.  Ms. Jenn came out and greeted us and took us back to her room.  She was about as cute as a person could be, so full of personality but handled Ed like a serious pro.  She has seen him in all his stubborn glory and is so patient yet pretty tough too!  She gets him to do more stuff than I ever could.  It has been an amazing thing to watch!  I would seriously have to lie down and nap after every kid, if I did this all day!  It is truly a sovereign gift from God to have that level of energy paired with creative ideas to help them stretch and develop!  

I am forever grateful to God for helping me along this painful journey!  I have friends who have children with serious disabilities and one recently diagnosed with cancer.  I try to remind myself how blessed I am that this is Ed’s issue and it’s not something life threatening but it has been heartbreaking at times. 

Ms. Jenn checking out Ed's cool boots!

My friend Mary Kay mentioned getting leg braces for Ed to get the most results.  After a few sessions working with Jen, she thought braces were a good option with as tights as his legs were and that it would be the quickest, most effective way!  The thought of your baby in leg braces immediately makes you think of Forest Gump but I want this over with as quickly as possible before kids get cruel to Eddie.  With his personality, he is liable to punch them out if anyone did make fun of him though!

We went to Hangar Prosthetics and they did a cast for his braces.  My friend Mary Kay showed up for moral support and is so smart, and had some M&M’s in her pocket as bribery for Ed to be cooperative!!  Thank God!  He got to pick out the pattern and colors and picked Spiderman with red straps!  A guy named Ben was wonderful with Eddie and handled him well!  We went back in 3 weeks and at first he thought they were totally cool!  We told him they were spidey boots and would help him jump like Spiderman! That seemed to work for about 30 minutes.  I took him to the Dollar Store to get some prizes for being such a trooper and it almost killed me to see him walk in these braces.  I choked back tears, when strangers would look him up and down with pity!  I know all of this needs to be done but it has been tough on my momma’s heart that usually lets him get away with too much being my baby boy!  Talk about tough love.

Ed gets his braces

He sobbed uncontrollably and I cried too!  I had a meeting at school and my poor mom agreed to watch him but she is a worse softie than I am and could hardly stand to make him keep the braces on! She did what every good grandma would do, she made him his favorite food, cheese grits and spoon-fed him while he sat on the couch and watched cartoons!  All the kids and I came back to pick Ed up and I was never so proud of them.  They oooed and awwwed over his cool spidey boots and told him they wanted them and made the biggest deal!  He suddenly was very possessive of them and proud!! 

He wore them everyday a little bit more so we could make sure they fit properly!  It was time for him to wear them to school!  I told the teachers at school and they were so supportive and also made a big deal about how cool they were!!   His friends hovered around him and loved his spidey boots too!  The thought of him trying to play on the playground and run with the braces on devastated me.  Dan kept encouraging me that he would be fine!  One of my best friends texted me that she watched him out her window at school and he didn’t miss a beat!  I was so relieved and thankful!

Serious Progress!

We get to see Ms. Jenn twice a week and Eddie has had some very good days with good attitudes and some weepy, bad days when he earned no candy.  Seeing Ms. Jenn every week has been a tremendous blessing and I will never forget how hard she has worked on my son and all the love and kindness that she has extended to him! 

We had a bright spot yesterday, when we went to pick up his night braces.  George couldn’t believe how much Eddie had improved and really commended our effort!!  He said we were going to be a great success story! Yes, I choked back tears because I was so relieved!  This task and burden weighs very heavy on me!  I feel guilty for not looking into it years sooner when it started!  I didn’t not out of neglect but out of experience.  All my other kids toe walked and eventually came down on their own but Ed was getting consistently worse.

Ed gets his night braces

Today, I was grabbing some lunch for myself on the way to therapy and Ed asked for a smoothie.  I said yes and then Eddie said, “How about we take one to Ms, Jenn!”  I said that was a great idea!  Who knows if Ms. Jenn even likes smoothies but I knew that she would be thrilled about Eddie’s thoughtfulness!  He has grown to love her and even cried to go see her on one of his days off!  As much as I want him walking normal, I will be sad to end my visits with Jenn when the time comes!  I hope to always stay in touch!

On one of my overwhelmed days, I remember praying to the Lord about how afraid I was about raising all these kids and meeting all their needs!  I wrote down what I felt like God was saying to me. Part of it was that He would bring just the right people I need into our life that would have the knowledge and skill set that my kids need to grow into their divine destiny!  That happened supernaturally with Annie’s swimming and again with Eddie's Angels!  I dedicated all these babies to the Lord and He has assured me that He is well able to care for all of their needs and for me to relax and to trust Him!  That is my plan and I am ever grateful for all the people who will help Eddie walk on his heels to becoming a mighty man of God!!!

River Fun October 2012

It freaks me out when I go to our family River house and take my standard “all my kids on the porch swing” picture.  They are growing by leaps and bounds and I can’t stop it or slow it down.  When we started building the cabin, Bonnie was one year old and was our only baby!  None of my kids will remember life without the River House.  What has changed are the activities they do.  When Bonnie was a baby, she made thousands of little fires out of sticks (we didn’t light them so don’t worry!)  They would make forts in the woods and play all kinds of imaginary games.  They are growing up and now I have to band them from their IPods and enjoy nature!  It’s really crazy that all five of them can go in the water on their own and are all good swimmers!   Man, that went fast!

We had a short trip but it was worth it.  There is nothing that can take the place of being at the River house.  It’s so beautiful and very peaceful.  Dan and I got in boats and floated around the river and chatted.  The kids swam even though it was already so very cold.  We walked through the woods and picked a HUGE, beautiful bouquet of wild flowers.  The little kids did the zipline and we played some football, of course.  KC howled and carried on and ran off a TON of energy!  Dan cooked great meals and somehow I even managed a nap on the porch swing amongst the chaos!

It’s becoming so very difficult to find time to go to the River, which makes me sad.  With all the kids activities and games it’s almost impossible to find a weekend.  I finally realized it’s never going to be convenient or easy but we will have to make it a priority because before I know it, they will be scattered from me.  I look at my brother and my sister’s kids who were all young when we started this project.  We all worked so hard, the kids included, to make the cabin a reality.  Now most of the kids are grown and rarely find time to go.  Life is truly a blur but I pray I can focus on pulling us together and creating more River memories!

USA Swim Meet 2012

Annie was pretty pumped about her first USA Swim Meet!  (Probably not as much as her psychotic, patriotic mom though!!)  Her first swim coach called me a couple days before to tell us how proud she was and that she would be coming to the meet to support Annie and the other BAC swimmers!  She told me that Annie was ranked high but may be overwhelmed with how the meets are run.  The River City Meets from the summer are user friendly!  They have volunteers that organize all the swimmers before their heat.  With the USA swimmers, it’s up to the swimmer/parent to get them to the block, ready to race!  Also, you have kids from all over competing!  I was nervous and always marvel at how Annie stays so calm! I just don’t understand calm people!  I sure wish I were one of them!  My stomach was in a knot on the way there and I took a coke hoping to settle my stomach. As big and strong as Annie is, she is still just a 7 year old, little girl!

Coach Paul and Coach Cynthia Dunbar

Annie's swim buddies, Carley and Abby!

Dan took her early to warm up while I got the other Wog kids settled.  I was running a little late, and by running, I mean, I was running like a crazy person trying not to miss her relay!  The USA meets mean business! They start on time and zoom.  I got the pool and my Annie was in the water kicking her heart out on a relay team.  Dan timed her at 19 seconds for a 25 Freestyle, which would be her best time if it were an individual race.

Her next heat was the 50 Freestyle.  The first time Annie ever swam this was at her second meet and she burst into tears, her arms and legs were burning so bad.  I have that memory in my head and always worry for my girl.  She swam great and I thought got her best time.  Dan thought it was her worst.  It wasn’t until the next day when a friend checked the results for me and she indeed swam her best 50 Free!

Her last and best event was the Backstroke! Annie was made for this stroke apparently!  She started a little late but caught up quick and looked amazing!  She is one strong girl! She looks like she is moving slower than everyone else but her strength propels her through the water.  She ended up winning 3^rd place out of all the swimmers and swam her best 25 Backstroke time ever!  Did I mention she was the youngest too?  I was beyond proud and very relieved.  Annie takes all this in stride and her comment was,  "I should have won 1^st place!"  I have no doubt she will in the near future!!  I told one of her coaches how she did and he asked me how old she was.  I told him she turned 7 in April and his eyeballs got big and he said, “Wow, next summer, whe will be the best swimmer in the city, in her age group!”  Everyone assumes she is at least 9 years old or more because of her size.

 

On the way home, Annie said she felt sad.  I asked her why and she said because her meet was over.  She told me she feels sad after every time she races.  I explained to her that it’s because she is doing what she loves and what God has made her to do!  If she was relieved and dreaded it, it’s not her thing!  I don’t know what the future holds for my baby girl but I pray it includes swimming!  Swimming has caused Annie to gain so much self-confidence and I am so thankful she has found something she is good at and loves!  Now we are just counting off the days until her next USA Swim Meet in October!!  Swim Annie Swim!! 

Palm Tree Nightmare

Not sure what Bubba was thinking but he took Annie’s only football to his first youth group function ever, the Fletcher Football Tailgate Party!   He blamed his friends that were over but good grief, couldn’t he swap her football with one of his 20??  While the boys were throwing the football around in the Fletcher parking lot, Annie’s ONLY football got stuck in a palm tree.  I was so mad at Bubba and was scared to see what would happen when Annie found out

A couple weeks later, we are leaving Annie’s soccer game and Bubba asked me if he could go use Annie’s soccer ball to get out the football!  I said yes and quickly diverted Annie to the truck so she wouldn’t’ see her poor football lodged in the palm tree.  We got in the truck and she looks out the window and says, “THAT’S MY FOOTBALL!”  She starts to cry and says she is going to kick Bubba’s butt. (Yes I need to work on her inappropriate language but at the moment I agreed with her!)  The soccer ball was too soft to dislodge the football that was wedged down in between two branches.  I told Bubba I would run home and get a football and come back.  I went home and grabbed two of HIS footballs and went back.  He was just standing there and then I saw that ANNIE'S Soccer ball was now caught as well!  I parked, went over and we both started throwing football’s in the palm tree.  As if things couldn’t get worse, the two footballs got stuck too!  A maintenance man must have figured out what was going on or felt sorry for me and walked over.  He very graciously said he would go try to find some long pole to help us.  The wind started to blow hard and for a moment one football almost fell down. Not so lucky!

After about 10 minutes, I had given up on the maintenance man and was trying to figure out who is nice enough to come help me and I immediately thought of Brett, by brother in law.  I called him and of course he was poised and ready to grab a ladder and long pole to come help me.   Just in time, I saw the maintenance man coming with a long pole thing.  He quickly extricated the four balls out of the tree and I quickly released Uncle Brett from coming to the rescue.  All I really knew, is that I was not going home and telling Annie that Bubba lost her soccer ball AND her football.  I was afraid she might kick my butt too! LOL!

Boston Trip 2012

Dan casually mentioned that he had a business trip coming up and he really wanted me to try to go with him.  I pretty much freaked out and was like, “NO!”  I haven’t flown in 11 years, since before 9/11.  Dan and I have only left our kids one night in 13 years. (A U2 Concert!) Dan was understanding and said it was OK but I felt ill.  I was so convicted and I felt like God said to me that He was trying to bless me and I was making it really hard!  LOL!  I love being with Dan more than anyone and loved the idea of three full days of being together.  The thought that threw me over the edge was how to manage, out of town, the schedule of my children while we were away.  We are blessed with a lot of family to help who were more than willing.  I just happen to be a mom that loves being at my kid’s stuff. 

The first thing that I shed quite a good amount of tears about was that fact that I would miss Bonnie’s first YouthQuake Live performance.  I was involved at the beginning with YQL and dreamed of the day one of my children could join!  Bonnie had a lead role too!  I was up in the night, so upset about the situation and trying to figure out whether to go or not.  When I asked my kids they were like, “Go Mom!”  Bonnie said very maturely that I would see her in many YQL’s for years to come! I was missing Bubba’s first home game for football too and of course he caught a pass for a touchdown.  I finally had the idea to go to the YQL dress rehearsal and at least see Bonnie in action!  She was awesome.  I could have never done what she did at 13 years old!  I was super proud!  I was wondering how she knew how to do the psycho mom role so well though! :) My sister Vickki was in charge of getting Bonnie to the show and I knew she would hawk over her and that all would be well!

My mom offered to come stay with the kids and the DOG!  I knew she really loved me because her and KC aren’t the best of friends!  They have stand-offs on a regular basis. Their disdain for each other is mutual.  My boys don’t do sleepovers well and it just made it easier for her to stay at my house.  I felt really bad about that.

Our flight left at 7 AM on Friday morning so mom offered to come o, at the crack of dawn, while the kids slept. The preparation to leave almost killed me.  My brain went on overdrive thinking through every detail of all of the kid’s schedule.  I typed out a list by the hour.  They go to school at different times, get picked up at different times, Annie has swimming, Bubba football, Bonnie YQL.  Maggie and Eddie were the only ones that made it easy!  I bought nice bones for the dog so mom could bribe her.  I had to like REALLY clean the house too!  I kept thinking that if I died in a crash, I didn’t want people to see my hidden junk and judge me after my death for being such a sorry housewife! 

We got to the airport and I had my first TSA experience. Dan said it was a really short line.  It was freaky seeing all these people somewhat undressing with belts, shoes and such and then redressing.  It felt a little too intimate.  We got a Starbucks and right when we got to the gate, they started boarding.  The flight was on time and very smooth. We flew on JetBlue, which has individual TV’s at every seat.  It was a very pleasant trip.  We caught a cab and headed to our hotel.  It was a wild ride.  I sat in the middle and stared out the front so that I wouldn’t barf in the cab!  The hotel was beautiful with a very ornate lobby.  For some reason, they upgraded us to suite and the closet in the hotel was bigger than my kitchen!  It was hotter than I thought so I changed clothes and put on my Dad’s Boston Red Sox hat. 

When Bubba was a little boy, we went to the mountain cabin where we have gone to my whole life.  My Dad loved the Red Sox and dreamed of going to Fenway Park to see a game.  At the cabin, my Dad had left a Red Sox hat there many years ago.  Bubba started wearing it and my mom told him he could have it and take it home! Bubba has been a Red Sox fan for years now!  When I put it on, my eyes filled with tears, wishing once again that my Dad was with us, having this experience visiting Boston, the home of his beloved Sox!

We walked to the mall and ate and then went to the Boston Museum of Fine Arts!  It was a longer walk than we thought.  Poor Dan only brought flip-flops!  After we left the museum, we decided to walk back a different way.  Low and behold, I looked up and was on Fenway road.  I texted the picture to Bubba!  We walked along this beautiful road and I was amazed at the beautiful architecture and all the beautiful window boxes full of flowers!  It was just so peaceful and wonderful!  I glanced through some trees and couldn’t believe my eyes. I saw Fenway Park in the distance!  Once again, tears sprung to my eyes not believing that I was really there! Thank God for Siri!  I am like indebted to her after this trip!  She guided us and found stuff from restaurants to Walgreens to historical sites! We would map ourselves and walk and follow the little dot on my phone to our destination! 

The first night we met with all of Dan’s business associates.  We jumped in another cab and headed to our restaurant.  Dan was cracking up in the back seat at me.  I sat up front and pretty much knew the whole cab drivers life story in our 7-minute ride!  We came swinging around the corner and there was Fenway!  I quickly snapped some pictures and was so excited! Bubba told me to wear one of his jerseys and Dan and I for once, actually matched!  I was in heaven.  We ate dinner and headed into the park when the skies opened with sideways rain and delayed the game.  It was kind of nice. We got to walk around on the concourses and look at memorabilia.  I bought Bubba a 100-year, Fenway baseball and waited until the rainstorm passed.  I met a cute couple on their honeymoon and Dan’s co-workers were laughing at me taking pictures of them!  One co-worker told me I was sweet!

Finally, the rain stopped and the staff went to work getting ready for the game! They rolled back the tarp over the field, brought in sand for the puddles and swept the field!  It was so very exciting!  I took videos and pictures and kept texting Bubba! I felt a little guilty being there instead of him!  Dan promised me he would plan a trip one day with Bubba!  I bought some peanuts and had fun just throwing the shells on the ground!  The Red Sox didn’t play that great but it was just incredible to see a player hit a ball over the green monster!  It was getting late and we were loosing but we stayed until the whole park belted out “Take Me Out to the Ballgame!” and all swayed together! It was perfect (besides the score!) 

The next day I slept until 9:30 in my pitch-black hotel room.  It was awesome! Dan hopped up and quickly ran across the street and got me coffee and breakfast!  I sat in my bed and relaxed and it was pretty close to heaven!  We headed out and Dan suggested we go to the Boston Library across the street.  We were blown away at the beauty!  It was like a palace inside!  We also went into Trinity Church! 

We got on a Duck Tour!  It was the coolest idea! In WW II, they invented amphibious vehicles called DUKW. They were boats that you could drive up on land that were pivotal in the D-Day invasion during the War.  They use those vehicles for tours of the city and of the Harbah (harbor!)  We had a crazy tour guy that made it so fun! It was quite amazing when our tour guide drove right down into the Charles River.  That night Dan’s business associates insisted on taking us out for Lobstah! (Lobster)

The next day, we headed out and got presents for the kids. I somewhat had shut down mentally by then.  I couldn’t even pick out t-shirts. Dan finally made some choices.  It had been so many years where I wasn’t racking my brain to keep up our family schedule that to just be free of responsibility was like an out of body experience!  I could hardly order a meal too!  I think that trip did more for me mentally than I will ever know!  I think it was healthy to only be responsible for myself.  I felt like a real person again and not just a mom. My brain was mush and was having a hard time making decisions.

We took a cab to Faneuil Hall, which is a Historical Market with all kinds of stores and vendors.  We saw the site of the Boston Massacre and walked along the Harbor to the Tea Party site!  We stopped at the Granary Cemetery where many American heroes are buried like Paul Revere and Benjamin Franklin.  We went in the most beautiful park, Boston Common and sat and enjoyed a pretzel and people watched.  It was the first park in America with so much beautiful flowers and people of all ages enjoying the beautiful sunny day!  We ate a great meal and headed to the airport for our flight home! 

I am very thankful for our family who managed the Wog Tribe and made this experience possible! Even KC got a good report (except for her tearing up a diaper and the trash incident) I am so grateful that I went on this trip and didn’t miss this time with Dan and this time to rest my mind!  It was so peaceful, it shocked me!  I didn’t’ hustle, rush, hurry! I just wondered around a great, historic city with my best friend of 20 years!

Pray, Love & Serve

I started working with young people when I was recruited as a Young Life leader when I was 19. I was barely older than the high schoolers but it was pure joy for me.  I was ever amazed at their energy and their creativity.  Once again, I am overjoyed at watching a younger generation rise up and shine.  Pastor Howard shared in church about how it’s time to get back to basics and that our church would be focused on three things for the future, Pray, Love & Serve. Shortly after, I got a text from Cara who had been thinking about the new theme of our church and sent me an incredible logo she created!  My heart leapt for joy and I immediately texted back that I needed a T-shirt!  Everyone who knows me understands that if there is spirit wear to be had, I am all in!  I totally believe in walking billboards!  My drawer is filled with all the causes I love!  Cara said they were already working on getting t-shirts printed and it was a serious happy day when I could purchase mass quantities of shirts for the Wog tribe….if only Dan would participate!  I traumatized Dan after 9/11 with an obsessive amount of Flag shirts and he has revolted against matching spirit wear of any kind!  Pray for him!

I walked up on a discussion on what color and type of shirts to order.  I proclaimed that I would wear anything that was printed because it wasn’t a fashion statement it was a movement!  I truly believe that God is doing something supernatural and people will be drawn to be a part. The T-shirts were sold yesterday in church and they were selling like hot cakes!  It was a beautiful thing to see the young and old unified, wearing our new Pray, Love and Serve T-shirts!  Pastor Howard challenged our church to pray and fast for 30 days as a church, to ask God for direction, to pray for our little ones and to pray for our possessions. Dan and I miraculously both fasted and made it to prayer the first week! I am warning people that try to give an excuse why they can’t participate….really??  Come to my house and see what a true effort and sacrifice it is to go to prayer and still get 5 kids dressed and ready for school!  :) I truly believe that God is requiring all of us to pray like never before.  We are living in desperate times.  We are surrounded by sad, devastating situations that require God’s miracle working power just to survive. I am expectant to see all the answers that will follow from this time of unified, focused prayer!

Loving others proves to be one of the most difficult things to do.  Sounds sweet and sappy, but to truly love past offenses, hurts, rejections is more difficult than anything I have ever tried to do.  It’s easier to be miffed and avoid people than to offer love and forgiveness in order to retain the relationship.  To be wounded and to wear it like a badge of honor is the natural thing to do.  The most noble, Godly thing to do is to QUICKLY extend forgiveness and move on.  I was convicted today at prayer about a grudge I have been holding for years.  It’s time to purge and purify ourselves of our old, comfortable behaviors and to truly be doers of the Word and not hearers only.

We had a Church Covered Dish on Sunday and I have been pondering the wonder of it all for the past couple days.   It was an “All Hands on Deck” moment for me!  Every age church member from children to senior saints, pitched in to make it one of the best church functions I have ever been too.  Excitement, joy and love was the permeating feeling of the day.  Everyone wanted to be a part and to help!  It was quite a beautiful sight to behold not to mention the awesome food that we enjoyed. 

It’s been a long, sad few months for me but I feel like we have turned a corner to brighter days.  I am honored to wear my Pray, Love and Serve t-shirt and I am dedicated to making it a part of my daily life and not just another spirit wear shirt in my drawer!  

Pregos

I am a very sentimental person and I usually have to fight from being so melancholy about my kids growing up and time moving so swiftly.  Staying grateful and trying to enjoy every stage is what I try and focus on.  Today, I was thinking about four girls who I love very much, who I have known since they were young, that are now pregnant.  It was such a relief that I have NO melancholy feelings about pregnancy when I see them.  I put my time in having five kids and I almost shutter at the thought of every having to be pregnant again.  Luckily for me, that is physically impossible, Praise Jesus!!

I never lost the wonder and miracle of pregnancy.  You would think five times later it would be no big deal but it blew my mind every time how truly crazy it is that we can function and still grow a human being at the same time.  I actually looked great pregnant!  My face was nice and full with no wrinkles, and my hair and nails were amazing….I miss that and secretly still use photos of myself pregnant but cut my bottom half off!

The fact that we continue to feed them from ourselves (for a total of over FIVE years for me)…..it’s just mind blowing!  I did not enjoy nursing.  I am so high-strung, it was pretty torturous for me but I knew it was the most convenient, economical and healthy thing for everyone.  I was committed to it and I successfully nursed them all until they went to regular milk. None of them ever had formula.  I can’t believe I accomplished that because it was stressful being the sole source of food.  I felt claustrophobic and trapped so many times.  I know it was only through God’s power that I made it.  I never stopped all the things I was involved with I just nursed on the fly and kept moving.  I have a very hard time when people give me a bunch of excuses that they are too busy with their kids to serve or help….I fight LOLing in a serious way!  It’s kind of hard for me to have sympathy.

I am very excited for Laura, Jesse, Val and Kathleen to have their babies and grow their families.  I think each one of them are incredible women and will take the challenge of juggling a family, and also fulfilling their personal callings.  It thrills me that I am watching a new generation carry on and grow more Christian leaders.  I know I struggle with balancing a family and ministry sometimes but I feel in my heart if God gives you the desire to pursue something, than He will give you the supernatural strength to do both!  I will cheer these precious girls on, encourage them and pray like crazy!!!  You can do it all girls!!!! You really can!!  xoxo

PS- Did I mention how ridiculously hilarious it will be to see James as a DAD!!  Wow!!